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Mission: BILLY HARRIS VS TAO BERMAN / BECHTEL vs MOLE

Woke up this morning with a bit of a headache. Last night we went out to a bar for a little Live band action (Adam Woodall Band). Never in my life have I seen so many skinny ladies in one room. The hoops and elevator flip flops were way out of control. I swear I overheard this woman talking, (Boobs of course falling out of her top). She was all ticked that some manufacture made their pants a size 8, “I am so obviously a size 6”. She said all indignantly. I maybe losing touch with reality, but skinny girls are well..... kinda.....kind of skinny........... I know I know there supposed to be pretty an all but some of them like the science room skeletons in grade 12. Girls just aren’t the same any more, “this doesn’t include J-LO she is still very yummy”. I mean I think that I am slowly becoming UN-Cool! Here are the signs:


I think that dental floss for undies is stupid.


I won’t wear my pants around the bottom of my ass.


For the love of god I think mesh hats look really, dumb.


Them cut off pants that are around the calves look too “ahoy mate”fer this cowboy. The last kid I saw wearing bell bottoms could have had homeless people living around his ankles.

Doing what I do for a living means that I am going to have to try to be more flexible about my style. I am never going to find the 12 year old boy look on girls pretty, but I am going to try to listen to more rap or something (DMX) and wear baggy pants today wish me luck. Cause I am going to NEED IT.


Tao Berman Josh Bechtel and Jock Bradley are showing up today. They are joining James and I to run and shoot a bunch of waterfalls in the Whistler area. Tao for those that don’t know is a little bit of a wild man. He loves the wood and can’t drive by something hard without running it. His buddy Josh is the same. Now James and I we both like running rivers but stop at the sight of wood and turn our noses up at anything that looks like it will kill us. We are kind of sissy’s by comparison the thought of running with these two monsters of white water made us feel a little stressed out. These guys don’t come to Skook to kick our asses no more than we follow these guys down everything in a bid to keep up so we were both on uncharted waters of the relationship.

Well we get on the road idiots all packed and being mouthy and what happens. Well BC gets the Olympics..... That means the some porch monkey in charge says build the sea to ski highway wider. I guess he was from out east cause DAM that’s a lot of frigg’in blasting. The mountain in this case is made of well ROCK. All the way, I don’t mean little bitty pieces but mountain size rock . Porch monkey in charges says “GO FOR IT and we end up in line 2 KM from where we started.........


It took 3 days for me to get whiplash but on the final day I did it. We had followed the two nut bags all over without getting out to walk to often and the last day was the clincher. We ran the top drops of Rainbow Falls in Whistler Mountain area. Jock had us hang out to wait for several hours for the sunlight to come in. Jock likes the sunlight to be so bright that just as you hit the lip sunlight blinds you. Well in this case it was a 20 footer with a crummy line all the way across and no sunlight.(Can’t blame JOCK) I was the leader to this hideous looking slot with rocks on either side. Because I has spent 2 days with Bechtel and Berman without swimming or walking I thought that I would lead. In FINE Harris fashion I hit the lip and the back end of my boat drags out. I was really far forward and ready to hit the water at 45degrees. Well when good plans go bad............ I managed to hit the flake rock about 19 feet down at about just over 90 degrees. I could hear the laughter before I rolled up and over the rumble of the water fall. (Nothing like paddling with good friends) The line was changed abruptly and everyone styled it. James and I who were less than impressed with the manky looking line ended up punching in the front of his boat to. I wish that I had some photos of the boats but both of them popped out in about 4 hours. We are headed out to the Skook Freestyle event. It is all about no prizes no comp just 5 days of Big Air. NO points nothing. Nothing like an adventure to get me all excited. My gears’ all packed and ready to giver and I pick the Girl up at 10am tomorrow. Hope all you monkeys are not spending too much time reading my garbage. Have a good time and make a mission of your own. Just a small warning. it might be as crazy as mine.

“WEST COAST BABY” it’s my new Gang sign.

Harris ON A MISSION

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